Monday, April 4, 2011

How to run a Love Motel

Like technology for Japan, South Korea is at least five years ahead of the US with its own titillating industry: love motels. They’re everywhere. We found one near the Gyeongju bus station (naturally) that came recommended by LP and Tia is threatening to move in for good. Here's why:

1.  Popcorn machine in the lobby
2.  Dark glass reception window painted with a lascivious pixie and a small hole at the bottom where you duck your head to ask for a room (yes, they seem surprised when you want to stay a whole night -- yes, a whole night -- yes, for sleeping)
3.  Profound, nonsensical quotes on the hallway walls (e.g. “A life without love, without the presence of / the beloved, is nothing but a mere magic-lantern show”)
4.  Suite with magic-castle-in-the-forest theme
5.  Free bottle of Korean port
6.  Mirrors on the ceiling (obviously)

7.  Mood lighting, e.g. glittered ball on bathroom ceiling softly changing colors
8.  Complete array of free men’s products: after shave, cologne, hair spray, facial cleanser, condoms, shoe horn
9.  Heated toilet seat with special spray settings for women

10.  Full hair product suite for women – Vidal Sassoon shampoo and conditioner, hair dryer, round brush, hair spray, smoothing gel, spare hair elastics, etc.
11.  Enormous flat screen TV with all sorts of channels (wink, wink)
12.  Full spa bathtub with two headrests and accompanying hot pink bath salts
13.  Loads of other free stuff!

The place screams of sketchiness and class at the same time (the numbers for hookers on the outside door make it lean more toward the former).  Still, after a few days of sleeping on floors, this is perhaps the best $55/night we have ever spent.  

No comments:

Post a Comment